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Case Studies in Usernames
Case Studies in Usernames Let’s face it, most guys aren’t pure man-candy. Most guys don’t have athlete’s bodies. Most guys aren’t wealthy. Most guys aren’t lyrical geniuses with words. Most guys aren’t world travelers. Most guys, by virtue of the world we live in, are slaves to their jobs and don’t have time to lead facinating and sophisticated lives. Most guys aren’t The Most Interesting Man in the World. But here’s the good news … those aren’t the things women first notice in a guy online anyway. So you’re back in the running. The first thing a woman notices in a guy is … drumroll please … his username! You could look like Rashad Jennings (swoon), but if your username is Born2LickPussy, I’ve already clicked off before I’ve noticed those abs (those delicious abs). You’d think that would go without saying, but the overwhelming number of guys here need some lessons on this. Now, don’t be patting yourself on the back just because your username isn’t a sleazy reference to sex or your penis. I’m also referring to you guys who have lazy and thoroughly unoriginal usernames. On the other hand, usernames that are clever and make me smirk a little bit might as well put you in neon letters, in a good way. Any Reference to your Genitalia This is the low hanging fruit on this topic, so lets just get it out of the way quickly. Any references to your penis get summarily dismissed. No exceptions. I seriously do not care how impressive it is. Usernames like that are not original. They’re not clever. They’re rather infantile. Come on, say it with me … penis! Penis-penis-penis! PENIS! It’s like you guys just want to stand up and shout “I have a PENIS.” What do you think our reaction to that is? You’re like a 5 year old needing Naked Time. Grow up already! LongHardOne NYCOCK1971 9inchStick And more time for good measure...PENIS! Any combination of the number 4 and the letter U What is this? Early 1992? How are you thinking that in all the the internet has been in existence that this is still creative and inventive? Bonus points for reading that and thinking “But Venus, was it ever creative or inventive?” … no, no it wasn’t. Captain Obvious I already know why you’re on the site. It’s a hookup site. I’m not saying that to shame you, that’s the reason the site exists. Don’t feel bad about using it for its intended purpose. Guess what, a lot of women are here for just that too. But if you’re username is WantingToPleaseU, you haven’t told me anything I don’t already know. It’s not creative and different. It does NOT tell me that you’re a special snowflake and, unlike others here, care about my pleasure. Get over yourselves. It is a lazy reference to sex. Nothing more, nothing less. All it tells me is that you’re here to get laid. Thank you Caption Obvious, I already knew that. Lookin4NSA HornyMale4U JustLookingNYC MilfHunter Yawners These are the ones that aren’t sleazy or suggestive. They actually aim to be informative. But they’re just so unimaginative. I can hear you guys thinking, “Hmmm … how do I come up with a username? If only there was an algorithm for this!” So you guys went ahead and created algorithms. Facepalm! Town where you live + Year you were born, current year, or some other arbitrary number Hackensack1971 GlendaleGuy6969 SullivanCounty82 Generic factoid + long string of numbers or state abbreviation ArmyVet040991 Love2Travel1234 DogLoverNJ None of these are offensive … but they don’t exactly draw me in either. I see them and yawn. Is that really what you want my first impression of you to be? A yawn? aim higher. Any Form of Fanboy Interests No1YankeeFan (yeah, you and 10 million other NYers) IamBatman (how cute, a man who still wears underoos) CenaSmackdown (really, you think you’re going to attract women with wrestling references?) It is ok to have these interests … (sort of, no, not really, that’s a discussion for another time) … that’s not the problem. The problem is that you’ve presented yourself as of those social outcasts who live in their parents’ basements collecting Star Wars toys thinking they’re somehow collectibles. Are you a man or a 12 year old boy? They’re NOT “figurines,” they’re ’s toys! Incomprehensible Gibberish Ever see those people who invest in vanity plates for their cars, but clearly couldn’t get any of the s they want, so they resort to something that clearly means something to them, but is nonsense to the rest of the world? The reaction is universally the same, we all think “Why invest in a vanity plate if it is just gibberish?” TK421 (I don't care if this means something to Star Wars fans, it’s gibberish to the rest of us) Ynghngstud (how many of you hstly read this as “Young Hung Stud” at first glance?) 2BNot2B (don’t bother with Shakespeare unless you can do him well) Some Positive Examples I don’t like being all negative. So here’s a few that I came up with that I would try if I was a guy creating a new account. CulinaryJedi (a more creative way of saying “I like to cook”) OneLeftShoe (I don’t know why you only have one left shoe, but I’m open to hearing the story behind this) UptownCaveman (I can vouch that this works) IllogicalPossibility (I tend to like oxymorons, they always sound intriguing) IllAdvisedChoice (a better way of saying “I’m the bad boy your mother warned you about”) FunkyNinjaSkills (Bruno Mars funky? Yeah! We need the funk, gotta have that funk!) I would gladly say hi to any who messaged me with a username like any of these. You may not be a lyrical genius, but if you’re going to venture into a forum that is pure words, it may be prudent to spend some time developing your skills verbally. That starts with a good username. You’ll gain more attention with a clever username than you will with a hot pic. |
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Anyone can start an IM message or any note with a , "Hey", or "Hello". This is because, mostly, you want to see if they are there, before you spend your time typing a paragraph and sending it into cyberspace, only to be answered with silence. Don't be a moron.
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I guess I break all these rule....lol Decided to take the idea if you have say it. But who knows maybe times are changing....
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I wonder were my username stands? It usually goes over people's heads. Cerios is the galic word for love and Eros is the Greek god of love and passion so it has multiple meanings but I go with passionate lover.
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A crass name will make me move on to the next profile. Guess that makes me shallow but oh well, that kind of stuff matters a bit to me. What I haven't figured out yet, and I've asked (with no reply which makes me wonder too) the few that I've across.... is what's up with the random three word profile name? Like someone just flipped through the dictionary and came up with three unrelated words. BroughtClingGreen WringLaterStepping CarrotWagonTriangle Seriously, I come across these type names all over the site and can't determine if they're site generated or just another glitch. They're always male accounts tho, I've never seen a female account named like that.
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12/5/2017 10:15 pm |
Good posting. I guess my username is just too boring.
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My handle won a contest in a chat room .It was free change your screen name night so I shot out about 5 of them .lol
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I will disagree with one thing , if I looked like Rashad Jennings I'm pretty sure my "handle" could be anything and I would do just fine Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.
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I don't see where these studies were conducted, they should probably be credited. My name would fall under the "Yawners" as it is a local reference. Yet, I've have had a good number of meets from this site(s). Some thought it was "clever". Also, the women who commented about my name didn't seem to have any issues with it 31st Virtual Symposium Screen Names WTH Is A RedRockRascal . When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
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good post..it sounds like you've studied this ...
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12/5/2017 4:19 pm |
Great post! Become a Apollorising2057 blog watcher!
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Very good post.
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This is a great post…. Rachel Mae
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thanks for the in-sight
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12/5/2017 2:34 pm |
that is a very informative post , thanks
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12/5/2017 2:33 pm |
Thank you.
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This is a great blog, thank you for pointing out the obvious..
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very enlightening
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I don't have much to say either way but also don't like names like born2lickpussy. A major turn off. Also anything with well hung, dick etc. Will not be interested for that reason alone. Humans are the most dangerous animals on earth. If only animals had the ability to know when to keep away from us humans they would be better off.
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Heading out, probably won't reply until tomorrow
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